Windows. Windows. Windows.

windows. We all heard about that "window" sometime after the diagnosis. It's there....but "it's closing"? GOD help me, I thought.....and prayed. I began a week long fast. Asking for direction. Hourly.I spent no time at all asking, "Why?"

But from the moment I heard the word. Autism. Our lives changed. I had no time to waste. This window....it's closing you say? And while I certainly spent a period of time grieving for my son, crying what felt like an eternity. I prayed. At this time, I wanted the best advice possible. 

I never saw this wrecking ball coming. I was not equipped. I had a lot of work to do. But I saw this window.....

  I was terrified to face this condition of which I knew nothing about. I was overwhelmed by the advice society offers....from seaweed to electroshock therapy and everything in between. It seemed everyone had answers.
Everything else in my life became so trivial for a period. My job as a stay-at-mom changed over-night. Decisions decisions decisions. *Tick tock, tick tock.

I'm so thankful to NOT be at that point any longer. I'm very grateful that we were able to not only decide on our choice of treatment, but able (by the grace of God) to start treatment quickly. I'm so thankful for where we are at. This is what my window looks like now.......

                             It's a beautiful window.

And it always has been. The TICKING clock offered me an enormous amount of pressure.
As a mother to a beautiful boy who needed my help in ways that no one ever has.
I'm still thankful for the clock, and the "window" as it was an incredible driving force for me. I felt GOD lead in our decisions for my little man. And at this point..... the point we are at right now with Jaxon......looks and feel very much like this...........

 Because our choice approach has gotten his attention. He is clearly so much more aware. And I can think back to a time not so long ago, when he completely lacked any motivation at all to learn. There was no driving force for him. And possibly he didn't know HOW to learn. Nonetheless, I'm am so grateful for where he is today. In the last week, he has been saying the word, "happy". Today, he shared his ability to say..............

 And while it's no ones birthday here......I'll take it!! Because you easily question if your child will ever speak spoken language........until they do. Never lose hope. Lose an approach if it isn't working. But never ever lose hope. 

Nanna, Nanna, Boo-boo, Stick Your Head in Doo-doo.

 

Yes, that is our son's Ipad2 engulfed in milk and cheeze-it crumbs. This is common in our house. This is the condition you find it in, when Jaxon is left with it unsupervised. This is the condition of many things found in our house on a daily basis. And I'll take it over feces anyday.

After several weeks of Jaxon repeatedly sticking his hands down the back of his diaper after dropping a deuce......my husband and I were mortified......and exhausted. He gets a bath everyday. So we found ourselves giving him 2 bath a day. 

His nurse informed me last week that this was actually a typical behavior for someone his age. I can't tell you how happy I was to hear her say that. I'll take ANYTHING typical.

Not this germ fa'reeeeeek. Nightmare. On high alert. For the dreaded dookie. BUT wait.....there's HOPE........................................................................

Yes! Onzies in sizes 5T and 6T! When my package arrived yesterday, I couldn't rip it open fast enough! I am very very pleased with them and the quality. Jaxon does not seem to mind them. The transition from high alert to moderate (for my anxiety) is very welcomed. 


http://www.facebook.com/pages/2T-3T-4T-5T-6T-Bodysuits-onesies-by-TodBods-and-Essential-Whites/198809310140316?sk=app_4949752878

Autism vs Aliens

Having a son with autism allows me to have some days where....I feel like Hudson. Game over man, GAME OVER! I could look at my husband and say, " I hate to rain on your parade man, but we just got our asses kicked!"

And some days, I'm more like Ripley. An advocate through the nightmares. A strong intelligent selfless being ready to do whatever needs done.

While I have no desire to wake up after 57 years of hypersleep, a sole survivor....only to return to a planetoid in hopes of saving a terraforming colony from scary aliens with concentrated acid for blood...............I had no desire to view autism as anything other than a hereditary disorder that would never affect any of MY children, in a state that doesn't recognize autism as a treatable condition, with very little resources across the county and state, all the while understanding the dyer need for the earliest intervention possible.

Most days, I feel like a Ripley. But sometimes, in the middle of the day....at any given moment.....I can revert to a Hudson mentality......recognizing that some days....I'm just getting my ass kicked.